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There is a simple way to be happier. Take turns sharing stories about times when you were happy and when you made someone else happy. Here are more Eye-Opening Conversation starters.
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Crisis Counselling

The situation

A member of the support staff of a University was intimidating his staff and being verbally abusive. He had been told that he must change his behaviour or he was in danger of losing his job, and that he might find some time with me helpful. He was a very big man, an expert in martial arts and had been violent in the past.

The solution 

I listened to him carefully without judging or blaming and so he told me his story.

He was the youngest of five children and when he did not do as he was told, he was beaten. He was partially deaf, so often did not hear what was expected, but this was not diagnosed until he was five years old. His protests were ignored.

When I said he did not deserve to be beaten, his eyes filled with tears. It was a great relief to tell his story. He realised he got aggressive to avoid being hurt and this might have been necessary then but was not necessary now.

The results

Both he and his colleagues say he is a changed man, being gentler, much more positive and more relaxed with his people. I met him again two years after the four half-day sessions we had and the changes had stuck.

He came to an event I ran on stress and said "I wanted to come, because if you can do for others, what you did for me, I want to support you".


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Contact me

Phone +44 (0)1707886553, or +44(0)7879861525 email or Skype nickheap

Using these materials
I am entirely happy for you to use or draw on any these materials in any way you think will be helpful. I am keen to have my work, and the work of the people I have learned from, used.  


The language on this site is correct UK English throughout. There are differences in spelling and meaning between UK and US English. The context should make the material understandable in the US.

Further Information

There are free articles, exercises, designs, book references and links to other sources about many aspects of personal, team, management and organisation development on this website. I will add other resources as I learn what you want.

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